Give Yourself Grace
with DeTerrence Allen
Behavior Bites Podcast - Ep47August 28, 2024How often do you give yourself grace?
Do you let fear hold you back from saying yes and trying new things?
During today’s meal— I speak with a behavior scientist about the importance of collaboration, how to instill self-reflection in supervisees, being kind to others and ultimately yourself, and a surprising revelation that he hates public speaking.
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Amuse-Bouche
Why is collaboration important to you?
Appetizer
How did you get into Behavior Analysis?
Palate Cleanser
Describe a must-try meal in your area of the South
Entree
Something you wish you could have told yourself when getting started?
One thing people are surprised to find out about you?
Dessert
What’s an “insult” you’ve received that you’re proud of?
Excerpts from the Episode
(*Paraphrased highlights)-
We live in a time in which we have instant access to individuals, but rarely do we take the time to develop the skill of how to hear what others are saying and then being able to integrate it into our own practice.
Particularly in my supervision realm, as soon as students pass the test, as soon as they get those acronyms behind their name, collaboration stops— I am the end-all be-all to solving your behavioral needs.
In my supervision sessions we'll have dialogues, and guess what?
I'm just going to listen.
I'm not here to change your opinion about how this procedure works. This is a point in time in which I'm just actively listening.
It's crucial that we're not the know-it-all at the table, and we're actively listening to parents as well, as they contribute to treatment and decision-making.
It's imperative that we listen to the individual as they not only tell us about their experiences, but we support them in their experience.
Collaboration is one of those key cornerstones in behavior analytic work. If you've got it and you understand how to do it, then you get a lot of responding that is in your favor.
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Give yourself grace, kid. You have the ability to positively or negatively impact someone, but you rarely give yourself grace in your own errors.
If we were to functionally define grace, it's the ability to recover from a decision that may not have been favorable or in line with your own personal values.
Hindsight is always 20/20, but grace is okay. What I find with a lot of behavior analysts, they are their own worst critics.
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Earlier on in my practice people would say, you're so arrogant.
I'm just really passionate about what I'm speaking about at that particular moment.
I have learned that in those moments where it's perceivable that I'm arrogant, I have to listen with a functional ear and a compassionate ear. Then have a reflective moment.
I've had to learn to tame my passion, come up with persuasive solutions, and be able to compromise.
ABOUT DeTerrence
DeTerrence Allen, Behavior Scientist, M.S., BCBA, LBA
DeTerrence Allen is a distinguished behavior scientist based in North Mississippi. His educational background includes a Bachelor of Science in Psychology and a Master of Science with an emphasis in behavior analysis from the University of Memphis. With over 12 years of clinical experience, he is a Board-Certified Behavior Analyst providing services across Alabama, Mississippi, and Tennessee.
DeTerrence believes that achieving meaningful change within management requires a concerted effort. He emphasizes advocacy, organization, and consistent systemic action to drive positive outcomes.
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